week 34.

by chelseakyaw

How far along: Thirty-FOUR w e e k s. As of 1/21/2017. And it feels like I’ve been pregnant for a thousand years and have a thousand years left.

Size of Baby: GINORMOUS. aka – as big as a cantaloupe or 5# and 19inches-ish?

Milestones: Forest is just putting on weight and length and developing his immune system. (They say that his testicles should be descending this week, but when we did the elective ultrasound about two weeks ago… his were down. PLEASE LET THIS MEAN HE IS GONNA BE BORN EARLIER I AM DYING) I feel that this is pretty standard from this point on, so I guess I’ll focus on MY milestones. LIIIIIKE… insomnia, and then finally when I get to sleep, I have to pee because baby buddy is on my bladder.

Best Moment This Week: FINISHING BIRTH CLASS… I also got all my maternity paperwork approved and am basically sitting pretty waiting. WAITING.

What I’m Looking Forward To: Finally giving birth. I’m just so ready to not be pregnant anymore. Arnold and I do a lot of talking on what we want and how we hope things go. AS MUCH AS WE CAN. I believe a birth plan is a waste of time. It’s important to be educated and to know that Arnold has my back (and his own input, too. This is his baby, as well). for what we would like. However, if a c-section is what needs to happen to bring him into this world, then it is what it is. Right now, I am working on my “psyche” to prepare as much as I can to go as long as I can without medication. I still have mixed feelings on analgesics and the epidural, but if I cannot bare it and I’m too exhausted – again, whatever brings Forest into this world safely is what I will do.

What I Miss The Most: I can only imagine that for the rest of my life, I will have a sickening worry that something is wrong or will go badly with my baby. I miss NOT worrying like that. It’s even happening with Arnold – like, I’ll just get so paranoid and overcome with sadness/anxiety/worry that something out of my control will hurt them and make them sick or take them out of my life. This is making me incredibly superstitious and “karma-ish” – probably being ridiculous. I just can’t help it. I can’t even read things about stillbirth or look at it because I worry it will jinx me.

Symptoms: I’m at the point where if I don’t eat CONSTANTLY (I mean this. CONSTANTLY. like every hour), then I’m probably going to get light headed, shaky, and irritable as hell. I worry that these mean pre-eclampsia but talking to my midwives, they say everything is okay. I do have low blood pressure, so that doesn’t help either.

Cravings: root beer floats. all week. and you know what?! these ridiculous cravings are probably why i’m fat. why can’t i crave kale or rice cakes or something like that?

DAD Thoughts: Arnold is getting fed up with me (heheh) because i’m stubborn and don’t let him help with things – things like lifting me from when i find myself on the ground, helping with stretches, and everything else. sorry babe, i’m stubborn.